Movie/TV Reviews

Nanny McPhee

Susan Granger’s review of “Nanny McPhee” (Universal Pictures)

Nanny McPhee is the most magical child minder to come along since Mary Poppins.
In Victorian England, Cedric Brown (Colin Firth), the village mortician, has been left a widower with seven naughty, undisciplined children who exasperate the cantankerous cook (Imelda Staunton) and scullery maid (Kelly MacDonald). To add to his woes, he’s been told by rich, imperious Aunt Adelaide (Angela Lansbury) that he must marry again within a month and give the children a new mother or lose the allowance on which he has supported his family. Suddenly, stern Nanny McPhee (Emma Thompson) arrives. Unorthodox and unattractive, she’s has a long, dark uni-brow; a bulbous red nose; fleshy, drooping earlobes; two large, brown, hairy warts; and a snaggle tooth – quite the opposite of pretty Mary Poppins. Instead of pulling things out of her carpetbag, she has a crooked cane that, magically, transforms chaos into proper order. And as she teaches the beleaguered Brown family five important lessons, the manners and the behavior of the mischievous children change, along with Nanny McPhee’s physical appearance.
Emma Thompson, who won an Oscar for her “Sense and Sensibility” screenplay, cleverly adapts the “Nurse Matilda” books by Christianna Brand, while Kirk Jones (“Waking Ned Devine”) directs with wryly wicked charm but few surprises. The CGI scenes are fun, particularly the comic pratfalls and colorful food fights. The Shakespeare-trained acting ensemble, which includes Derek Jacobi, Celia Imrie and Patrick Barlow, is superb, as are the children, led by Thomas Sangster, who played Liam Neeson’s son in “Love Actually.” On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Nanny McPhee” is a whimsical, storybook 7, teaching a valuable lesson that children not only need love and attention but also can handle honesty from adults.

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Big Momma’s House 2

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Big Momma’s House 2” (20th Century-Fox)

When a comedy isn’t funny, it’s pathetic, and when it recycles an over-used fat suit, it’s gross.
Manic comedian Martin Lawrence is back as Malcolm Turner, the FBI agent who goes undercover as sassy, plus-sized grandmother, Hattie Mae Pierce. This time, he’s in Orange County, California, posing as a nanny in order to work his way into the home of a suspicious tech company executive, Tom Fuller (Mark Moses), who is suspected of designing a deadly computer worm that could, potentially, compromise government secrets, and his over-organized, high-strung wife (Emily Procter). Of course, he has no idea how to care for their three neglected children, ages toddler through teen, and his obvious ineptitude at simple household tasks is played for laughs, as are his visits to a fancy spa and to the beach, where zaftig Big Momma, clad in a canary-yellow bathing suit and blonde cornrows, cavorts in slow motion, like Bo Derek in “10.”
Under the direction of John Whitesell (“Malibu’s Most Wanted”), Martin Lawrence seems to be going through his paces as a clowning caricature, rather than a character, along with Nia Long, as his very pregnant wife. Of course, the lame, formulaic plot, lifted from “Mrs. Doubtfire” by screenwriter Don Rhymer, offers them little to work with except a tequila-guzzling Chihuahua and cheesy, sentimental solutions for a dysfunctional family. And if Mark Moses looks familiar, you’ve seen him as Paul Young on “Desperate Housewives.” On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Big Momma’s House 2” is an embarrassing, one-joke 1. It’s a dreadful debacle, made worse by Lawrence’s promise/threat, “Keep a lookout. You never know when Big Momma might be back.”

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Annapolis

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Annapolis” (Touchstone/Buena Vista)

Burdened by underdog clichŽs, this is a tedious military drama about a young man determined to prove himself as a midshipman and boxer at the U.S. Naval Academy.
Jake Huard (James Franco) is an unlikely Annapolis plebe (a.k.a. freshman) in that he’s from an underprivileged, blue-collar background where no one expects him to succeed – not his stoic father (Brian Goodman), nor his friends, all of whom expect him to join them on the docks as laborers in the Chesapeake Bay shipbuilders’ union. But as he and his classmates struggle through the requisite training and endure the rigorous hazing, sensitive Jake proves that the one area in which is excels is fighting, a skill which, eventually, allows him to square off against his nasty, demanding company commander, Midshipman Lt. Cole (Tyrese Gibson), in the Brigade Championships.
“It’s the only place where everyone is equal,” claims the boxing coach (Chi McBride). “It’s where you find out what you’re made of.” Yada, yada, yada.
Based on an utterly predictable, uninspired script by Dave Collard (“Out of Time”) and directed by young Taiwanese-American Justin Lin (“Better Luck Tomorrow”), it bears touches of “An Officer and a Gentleman,” “Top Gun,” even “Rocky” – all far better films. The characters are written as superficial caricatures, so don’t blame the actors, including Jordana Brewster, Donnie Wahlberg, Roger Fan, Wilmer Calderon and Vicellous Shannon. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Annapolis” is a formulaic, feel-good 5. Although its heart is in the right place, the Navy has distanced itself from the film, stating that it is not an accurate description of life at the U.S. Naval Academy – nor are the deceptive TV commercials which tout non-existent scenes.

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When a Stranger Calls

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “When a Stranger Calls” (Sony Screen Gems)

A phone rings in a darkened house. The nervous baby-sitter answers and a creepy male voice inquires, “Have you checked the children?” Yep, it’s a remake of the 1979 terror tale.
Only this time, instead of a typical suburban home, it takes place in an ultra-modern lakefront estate, straight out of Architectural Digest. And the teenager-in-peril is not only sexy but rebellious, forced into child-tending by her father who has grounded her for an entire month because she carelessly charged 800 extra minutes on her cellphone bill.
On the dark and stormy night when Jill Johnson (Camilla Belle) arrives at the lavish but remote home of Dr. and Mrs. Mandrakis, they’re in such a hurry that they don’t even bother telling her the names of the children tucked in bed upstairs. Not that she’s really curious. She’s far more concerned that her boy-friend (Brian Geraghty) kissed her best friend (Katie Crosby, daughter of David). And she’s in a snit because she’s missing a bonfire celebration with her friends. But then the prank calls start. A mysterious, heavy-breathing voice (Lance Hendriksen) scares her – and the police are 20 minutes away.
Re-written by first-timer Jade Wade Wall and ineptly directed by Simon West (“Con Air”), it’s simply inane, despite James Dooley’s ominous, omnipresent music. In the original, the camera remained still and the subtle terror was insinuated as old pros Colleen Dewhurst and Charles Durning confronted the killer who was terrorizing vulnerable Carol Kane. But the punchline is the same: the phone calls are coming from within the house….yet no one thinks of utilizing either caller ID or *69. On the Granger Movie Gauge, “When a Stranger Calls” is a tepid 2. Put it on your “do not call” list.

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Failure to Launch

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Failure to Launch” (Paramount Pictures)

As date movies go, this misanthropic misfire is briefly amusing but instantly forgettable.
Tripp (Matthew McConaughey) is a 35 year-old luxury boat broker who still lives at home with his passive-aggressive parents (Kathy Bates, Terry Bradshaw). Why not? He’s coddled, catered to, and cleaned up after in comfy style. “It’s gonna take a stick of dynamite to get me out of this house!” this spoiled man/boy declares.
Obviously, he has commitment issues. To the rescue comes Paula (Sarah Jessica Parker), a “professional interventionist” hired to entice Tripp to vacate the premises. Predictably, Tripp and Paula fall in love. Did you doubt it for a moment?
While facile, unshaven Matthew McConaughey oozes with affable charm, Sarah Jessica Parker once again proves – after “The Family Stone” – that she’s best suited to the small screen (i.e. “Sex in the City”), particularly when she’s engaging in emotional prostitution. So it’s the likeable supporting players who propel the enjoyment.
TV writers Tom J. Astle & Matt Ember have given the NFL’s Terry Bradshaw some insightful lines like: “When I was growing up, nobody had self-esteem, and we turned out OK.” Not to mention his bare backside scene. Zooey Deschanel (“Elf”), as Paula’s boozy, moody best friend, steals every scene she’s in. One of my favorites was when she (never having read Harper Lee) wants to kill a mockingbird and tries to buy a shotgun and single bullet, or shell, from a hapless sporting-goods salesman (Rob Corddry from “The Daily Show”). Tripp’s nerdy buddies (Justin Bartha, Bradley Cooper) also amp the laugh quotient. And director Rob Dey never achieves the consistent tone that’s necessary for a screwball comedy. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Failure to Launch” is a barely sizzling 6. Why? The romance never ignites.

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Aquamarine

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Aquamarine” (20th Century-Fox)

Aimed at the same giddy, giggly audience who enjoyed “The Princess Diairies,” this is a frothy adolescent friendship tale that deals with drowning, rejection, self-awareness and conquering fear.
Set in Florida, it’s about two 13 year-old best buddies – Hailey (pop singer Joanna “JoJo” Levesque) and Claire (Emma Roberts from Nickelodeon’s “Unfabulous”) – who spend one last summer together before Hailey moves with her marine-biologist mother to Australia. After a violent storm, the girls find a sassy, swim-away mermaid named Aqua (Sara Paxton from “Darcy’s Wild Life”) in the pool. With wide-eyed naivetŽ, Aqua yearns to find a surface-dwelling man, not just some arrogant merman chosen by her father. So she promises to grant the girls one wish if they help her prove that true love isn’t a myth by getting the hunky local lifeguard (Jake McDorman) to say he loves her -within three days. The teens cheerfully high-five each other, thinking all their problems will be solved, not realizing that obnoxious, unscrupulous Cecilia (Arielle Kebble) has her eye on the lifeguard too.
Much like the Alice Hoffman young adult novel on which it’s based, it’s fast-paced, finny fun, reminiscent of Darryl Hannah’s “Splash” (1984). Aqua grows legs during the day that are replaced by a fishtail at sundown – or if her legs get wet. She also wears live starfish as earrings – they whisper into her shell-pink ears – plus, her pink-centric fingernail color changes to reflect her emotions. First-time feature director Elizabeth Allen and screenwriters John Quaintance (“Material Girls”) and Jessica Bendinger (“Bring It On”) keep everything swimming along. And if Emma Roberts looks familiar, think of aunt Julia. On the Granger Movie Gauge, “Aquamarine” is an amusing, sweet ‘n’ spunky 7 – if you’re a “tween.” If you’re older, this may be too soggy and sappy for you.

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The Hills Have Eyes

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “The Hills Have Eyes” (20th Century-Fox/Fox Searchlight)

Back in 1977, Wes Craven concocted a scare story about a typical American family on a camping trip being harassed by savage, cannibalistic mutants. Now the cult horror-classic has been remade for a new generation.
This time, gun-toting Ted Levine and devout Kathleen Quinlan play a squabbling couple from Cleveland who are celebrating their 25th anniversary with their extended family: two teens (Emilie de Ravin, Dan Bryd), a twentysomething daughter (Vinessa Shaw), her wimpy “liberal” husband (Aaron Stanford), their baby and a couple of German shepherds. Towing a Gulf Stream trailer through the Southwest en route to San Diego, they decide to take a scenic shortcut – until their tire blows out, not by accident, mind you, but from spikes deliberately placed on the lonely back road.
Remember that nuclear testing conducted in New Mexico during the Cold War era of the ’40s and ’50s? Layers of radioactive dust have wreaked havoc with the gene pool of a multigenerational family of nasty, savage mutants who live in the surrounding hills.
Directed by Alexandre Aja from a screenplay by Aja and Gregory Levasseur and produced by Wes Craven, it’s less inventive and far more graphically brutal than its predecessor, although that’s probably to be expected from filmmakers who achieved success from “High Tension,” a vicious French slasher picture. Aja confuses suspense with shock, sacrificing the former for the latter. And it seems that depravity has gone mainstream – without so much as a slap on the wrist from the MPAA. While it’s R-rated in theaters, you can bet the upcoming DVD will be sold to anyone and everyone. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “The Hills Have Eyes” is a tense, toxic 2. It’s a radioactive waste of time.

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VIDEO UPDATE

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s VIDEO UPDATE for week of Friday, June 23:

Jodie Foster plays Anna Leonowens, the strong-willed, recently widowed schoolteacher who travels to Siam in 1862 with her young son in “Anna and the King.” And Hong Kong action star Chow Yun-Fat is imposing and impressive as King Mongkut, the proud monarch who is amazed when an stubborn, impertinent Englishwoman dares ton consider himself his equal. It’s sumptuous film-making weighed down by a weak, simplistic subplot involving treason.
Filmmaker Barry Levinson says, “If I knew things would no longer be, I would have tried to remember better.” So the evocative, nostalgic “Liberty Heights” is his fourth semi-autobiographical film set in Baltimore, like “Diner,” “Tin Men” and “Avalon.” Focusing on the changing times of the mid’50s, it tackles provocative issues of race, religion, and class distinction.
“Gun Shy” has Sandra Bullock and Liam Neeson but something went terribly wrong with the incomprehensible script and lame direction of this silly mob comedy. “Grosse Pointe Blank” explored much the same ironic territory – far better – without colonic irrigation and poop jokes.
For pre-schoolers, Nickelodeon releases “Blues’ Big Treasure Hunt,” featuring a live-action appearance by Rue McClanahan and the vocal talents of Gregory Hines.
For foreign film aficionados, there’s “The Emperor and the Assassin,” Chen Kaige’s massive (161 minutes), sprawling epic tale of China’s first emperor, Ying Zheng, heir to the throne of Qin, whose goal was to unite the warring seven kingdoms, climaxing in the year 227 B.C..
PICKS OF THE WEEK: “Sweet and Lowdown” is Woody Allen’s fanciful, rhythm-filled mock documentary about a legendary jazz guitarist of the ’30s, played by Oscar-nominated Sean Penn. And “Topsy Turvy” is Mike Leigh’s charming, unconventional biopic of Gilbert & Sullivan, concentrating on their development of “The Mikado” in the 1880s.

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VIDEO UPDATE

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s VIDEO UPDATE for week of Friday, June 16th:

Just in time for Father’s Day, Universal Home Video has repriced ($9.98-$14.98) 21 male-oriented videos, including two new-to-video Westerns, “Gunsmoke” and “Ride Clear of Diablo,” which star Audie Murphy, the most decorated soldier of World War II. Others include “The Virginian,” “The Peacemaker,” “Hell’s Angel,” “Jet Pilot,” “The Texans,” and “Beau Geste.”
Adapted from a story by Isaac Asimov, “Bicentennial Man,” starring Robin Williams, chronicles the life of Andrew, who begins as a household appliance in 2005. But when his owner, Sam Neill, discovers he has creativity, curiosity and compassion, Andrew gradually becomes humanoid. The concept explores the technology of artificial intelligence but the screenplay, which spans several generations, contains too many characters and wallows in sentimentality.
“Play It To the Bone” revolves around two has-been middleweight fighters, played by Woody Harrelson and Antonio Banderas. They’re signed to fight a 10-rounder in Las Vegas, hitch a ride with a mutual friend, Lolita Davidovich, and experience recurring visions of Jesus. And Eric Roberts stars in “La Cucaracha,” a Hitchcockian tale of madness and redemption in Mexico.
For tots, from Nickelodeon, there’s “Blue’s Clues: Stop, Look and Listen” and “Maurice Sendak’s Little Bear: Rainy Day Tales.”
PICK OF THE WEEK: Best Picture contender “The Green Mile,” stars Tom Hanks as a guard on Death Row, circa. 1935. He recalls, in flashback, his poignant friendship with an unusual black prisoner (Oscar-nominee Michael Clarke Duncan) with a mysterious, supernatural gift. Adapted from Stephen King’s novella, this is a suspenseful, powerful adult drama – and the second execution is so boldly horrifying that words like gruesome and gory seem trivial.

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VIDEO UPDATE

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s VIDEO UPDATE for week of Friday, June 9th:

If you’ve got a taste for the eccentric, there’s Errol Morris’s sinister documentary “Mr. Death” about Fred A. Leuchter, Jr., a self-styled engineer who designs electrocution equipment. In the ’80s, he became the dupe of a neo-Nazi, Ernest Zunder, who hired him to visit Auschwitz and disprove the use of poison gas by the Nazis, thereby denying the existence of the Holocaust.
Writer/rapper/actor Ice Cube stars in “Next Friday,” a sequel aimed at the young, hip, urban audience, while “Backlash” is a suspense thriller about a hotshot federal prosecutor (Tracey Needham) who goes after a Colombian drug cartel with fatal repercussions. With the help of a homicide detective (Charles Durning), she uncovers a high-level government conspiracy and the only man who can save her is a convict (James Belushi).
There are four new “Taxi” videos featuring Andy Kaufman, the real “Man on the Moon,” plus “Andy Kaufman Plays Carnegie Hall.” They’re a tribute to the man whose comic genius influenced a generation of performers, blurring the lines between traditional comedy and avant-garde performance art.
For foreign film fans, there’s “The Eel,” Shohei Inamura’s sly, deceptively simple comedy about a Japanese man (Koji Yakusho) who kills his unfaithful wife and her lover and emerges from prison eight years later with an eel. He adores his pet because…”he listens to what I say…he doesn’t say what I don’t want to hear.”
PICK OF THE WEEK: “Girl Interrupted” is an episodic memoir, showcasing the acting talents of Winona Ryder and Angelina Jolie as self-indulgent inmates at Claymoore, an upscale psychiatric hospital during the ’60s. Jolie won a Best Supporting Actress Oscar for her performance.

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