Movie/TV Reviews

It’s Easier For a Camel…

Susan Granger’s review of “It’s Easier For a Camel…” (New Yorker Films)

Taking its title from Matthew 19:24: “It’s easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God,” this tragicomedy examines the life, the daydreams and the overwhelming guilt of a young Parisian woman who is far too wealthy. The burden of inherited money lies heavily on Federica (Valeria Bruni Tedeschi), as she compulsively confesses to a bewildered priest (Pascal Bongard). Her devoted father (Roberto Herlitzka) is dying, and its up to dutiful Federica, her jealous sister Bianca (Chiara Mastroianni) and playboy brother (Lambert Wilson) to comfort their mother (Marysa Borini). Meanwhile, Federica’s discontented with her live-in, working-class boy-friend (Jean-Hughes Anglade) and trysting with a former lover (Denis Podalydes) who, distressingly, has a wife and son. Revealing a deft sense of humor in this unabashed, seemingly uncensored self-portrait, French actress-turned-writer/director Valeria Bruni Tedeschi draws from her own experiences as part of a privileged Italian family that immigrated to France in the 1970s, adroitly interweaving fantasy and fun with the fragile truth of reality. And in a bit of clever casting, her on-screen mother is played by her real-life mother. Minus the usual coherent plotline, the film consists entirely of illustrative anecdotes focusing on Federica’s various relationships and yearning for freedom. And as the various affectionately amusing vignettes illustrate, money has clearly not brought happiness to this eccentric, emotionally crippled clan. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “It’s Easier For a Camel…” is a charming, insightful 6 with an endearing touch of obsessive, imaginative madness.

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Bright Young Things

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Bright Young Things” (Think Film)

Why is it that the parties of today are never as glamorous and exciting as those of yesteryear – at least on the silver screen? Adapted by writer/director Stephen Fry from Evelyn Waugh’s 1930s comic novel, “Vile Bodies,” this satirical romance chronicles the exploits of the young, idle rich, a group of decadent British aristocrats who seem to exist only to amuse themselves at parties. The story begins as writer Adam Symes (Stephen Campbell Moore) returns from France to England, where customs officials confiscate his just-completed manuscript. That doesn’t sit well with his publisher (Dan Aykroyd) nor his fiancŽe Nina (Emily Mortimer) because no job means no money, which means no marriage. When he wins an daring bet from a carefree socialite (David Tennant), a drunken Major (Jim Broadbent) disappears with the cash – and a subsequent visit to Nina’s father (Peter O’Toole) fizzles. Penniless and desperate, Symes agrees to write a nasty gossip column about London society, which leads to all sorts of contrived complications. While Stephen Fry is obviously attempting to draw a parallel between the debauchery of that syncopated, cocaine-drenched era and the obsessive celebrity culture of today, unfortunately, without intoxicating irony, it seems so irrelevant. Yet there are witty observations – “High society is an uneasy alliance between old survivors and bright young things: its glamour, a delusion; its speed, a snare; and its music, a scream of fear.” – and diverting cameos from Stockard Channing, Simon Callow, John Mills, Margaret Tyzack and Jim Carter. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Bright Young Things” is a brittle, scandalous 6, plagued by beastly British accents that make it difficult to decipher much of the dialogue. Perhaps it just doesn’t cross the pond too well.

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Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid” (Screen Gems)

When a movie’s this bad, you gotta wonder how and why it got made. Here’s the story. Back in 1997, there was this horror creature feature starring then-unknown Jennifer Lopez, along with Eric Stoltz, Ice Cube, Owen Wilson and Jon Voight. Despite its obvious animatronics, it actually did quite well at the box-office. So with today’s new technology to create computer-generated reptiles, producer Verna Harrah must have thought, “Why not try a sequel?” This time, the premise is that pharmacologists have theorized that there might be an orchid in Borneo that could prolong life. Off to discover this rare flower that blooms only two weeks every seven years are a group of New York scientists who don’t seem to realize it’s monsoon season and mating season for the anacondas. While there are seven credited screenwriters, not one of them realized that Borneo is near Southeast Asia, between Indonesia and the Philippines, and that anacondas are South American snakes. But why quibble about herpetology and geography? Matthew Marsden plays the research team’s leader, KaDee Strickland’s his assistant, Salli Richardson-Whitfield is the company’s science rep, Morris Chestnut is the money man, Eugene Byrd’s the computer geek, Nicholas Gonzales is the doctor who’s there for the adrenaline-rush, and Johnny Messner is the roguish, tough-guy boat owner who agrees to take them all down the river for a hefty fee, accompanied by his pet monkey Kong and a local guide, Karl Yune. Director Dwight Little (“Free Willy 2”) does keep us wondering who will be swallowed next by the giant carnivorous snakes. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid” is a ridiculous 2, featuring cellphones that even work in the remote jungle.

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Mean Creek

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Mean Creek” (Paramount Classics)

Developed and nurtured at the Eugene O’Neill Writers Conference in Connecticut, this coming-of-age allegory marks the emergence of a talented writer/director, Jacob Aaron Estes. Set in a small town in Oregon, the story revolves around a shy, sensitive kid, Sammy (Rory Culkin) whose life is forever changed when he’s faced with a terrible moral dilemma. Perennially persecuted by obnoxious George (Joshua Peck), Sammy, his older brother and friends decide to pay the bully back by taking him on a rafting trip where he’ll be stripped, stranded mid-river and forced to run home naked. “We need to hurt him without really hurting him,” they agree, acknowledging “that fat freak deserves everything he has coming to him.” But then confusion and chaos reign when a tragic accident occurs. Think “Lord of the Rings.” Think “Deliverance.” Jacob Aaron Estes crafts an insightful, character-driven tale and deftly directs his youthful cast, headed by Rory Culkin, who exudes sweet, adolescent vulnerability. His cohorts include Rocky (Trevor Morgan), his savvy, protective older brother; conflicted, meek-mannered Clyde, another victim of George’s teasing; misguided, macho Marty (Scott Mechlowicz), whose father recently committed suicide; and common-sense Millie (Carly Schroeder), on whom Sammy has a crush. Each character is carefully delineated and explored through his/her reactions to the dire predicament in which they inadvertently find themselves. And cinematographer Sharone Meir visually juxtaposes the bucolic, Mark Twain-like setting with the inherent savagery of the plot. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Mean Creek” is a poignant, suspenseful 7. It’s a thought-provoking journey of reprisal, retribution and responsibility.

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Exorcist: The Beginning

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Exorcist: The Beginning” (Warner Bros.)

Never underestimate the box-office appeal of a boring horror film. This ponderous prequel to the 1973 blockbuster “The Exorcist” stars Swedish actor Stellan Skarsgard as Father Lancaster Merrin, the cleric originally played by Max Von Sydow, in his first encounter with the devil. It’s 1949 and Father Merrin has given up the priesthood after the Nazi atrocities of World War II. In Cairo, earning money as an archeologist, he’s offered a spot on a dig in Kenya by a mysterious antiquities dealer (Ben Cross). It seems the British have unearthed a Christian church built years before Christianity came to sub-Saharan Africa. Accompanied by a Vatican spy (James D’Arcy), Merrin discovers that the superstitious villagers are tormented by an invisible presence that’s believed to dwell in the ancient church. So he joins up with a Sarah (Izabella Scorupco), a beautiful doctor, to delve into the ludicrous mystery which is compounded by a replica of the crucifixion hanging upside down and murals of a massacre. Could this be where Lucifer fell? Whatever. But Merrin repeatedly screams, “The power of Christ compels you!” Originally, Liam Neeson was cast as Merrin but he left the project after director John Frankenheimer died during pre-production. Stellan Skarsgard then shot Alexi Hawley’s story with director Paul Shrader, whose version was shelved because it was not scary enough. A third director, Renny Harlin, then came onboard and filmed it again with Skarsgard gamely revising his performance which is deliberately underscored with sinister mood music. But there’s no excuse for the unconvincing CGI hyenas, jackals and ravens. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Exorcist: The Beginning” is a gory, ponderous 3, making it tough to keep the faith.

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Vanity Fair

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Vanity Fair” (Focus Features)

Over the years, William Makepeace Thackeray’s novel has been made into many movies and mini-series, but this epic story of class differences, ambition, romance and war still resonates. Like today’s social-climbing trophy wives, beautiful Becky Sharp is born into poverty and – through sheer will and determination – is able make her mark by marrying men of influence and stature. It’s the early 19th century when Becky, the orphaned daughter of a penniless painter and a French chorus girl, attends Miss Pinkerton’s Academy. Trained to be a governess/teacher, she works for eccentric Sir Pitt Crawley (Bob Hoskins) in a country manor where she charms a rich, elderly aunt (Eileen Atkins) into taking her to London. There, she reunites with a prim childhood chum Amelia (Romola Garai), her feckless husband (Jonathan Rhys-Meyers) and her lovelorn Major (Rhys Ifans). Becky schemes to marry gambler Rawdon Crawley (James Purefoy) and to find her father’s patron, the Marquess of Steyne (Gabriel Byrne), as the Napoleonic Wars unfold. While Reese Witherspoon’s social-climbing Becky bears more than a passing resemblance to clever Elle “Legally Blonde” Wood, as she relies on her quick wit and sexuality to navigate the superficial shoals of society. Utilizing a bland, awkward script by Matthew Faulk, Mark Skeet and Julian Fellowes, director Mira Nair (“Monsoon Wedding”) blunts Thackeray’s astute social critique through too many truncated story lines and diminishes his ruthless, calculating character of Becky into a simplistic characterization. Nair incorporates her exotic Indian background into lavish scenes, including an incongruous Bollywood “slave dance.” On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Vanity Fair” is an opulent yet bland 6, never venturing below the veneer of its story.

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Paparazzi

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Paparazzi” (20th Century-Fox)

So what does Mel Gibson do after “The Passion of the Christ”? This petulant, far-fetched revenge saga that is so virulent in its blatant exaggeration that you can feel the hate. Here’s Bo Laramie, the action-adventure star of “Adrenaline Force” who finds himself tabloid fodder when a celebrity photographer snaps his son at a soccer game. After buying a luxurious home in Malibu with money made from his fame, Bo is astonished that anyone would want a snapshot of his family. Like what planet does he live on? Quick-tempered Bo punches this paparazzo who vows to get even, arranging a high-speed car crash – triggering awful memories of Princess Diana’s fate – in which Bo’s wife and child are hurt. Justified in his wrath, Bo then dispenses his own “Death Wish” brand of twisted vigilante justice with the help of the LAPD. To elicit sympathy, Bo is presented a decent, clean-cut Montana guy, blandly played by Cole Hauser (“2 Fast 2 Furious”), while the parasitic cameramen are unscrupulous, unshaven thugs (Tom Sizemore, Daniel Baldwin) who rape and blackmail women, carry guns, deal drugs and break into their prey’s homes. Dennis Farina is a “Columbo”-esque detective who sorts it all out. Mel Gibson does a cameo, as do Chris Rock and Matthew McConaughey, but Gibson also promoted Paul Abascal, his former “Lethal Weapon” hair-stylist, into the director’s chair. Either Abascal hasn’t a clue about clichŽs or Forrest Smith’s script totally lacked subtext. Whatever. The message is clear: Bo is blameless because it’s obviously an actor’s right to kill photographers if they’re annoying, invasive and rotten. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Paparazzi” is an amoral, loathsome 1. Forget tabloids. Scummy sleaze doesn’t get much more savage than this.

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Suspect Zero

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Suspect Zero” (Paramount Pictures)

Perhaps there have been just too many serial killer movies this year, like “Twisted” and “Taking Lives,” but everything about this so-called thriller seems overly familiar and tepid. Once a top Dallas FBI Agent, mild-mannered Thomas Mackelway (Aaron Eckhart) is now assigned to a minor-league field work in Albuquerque, where he starts getting threatening faxes from obsessive-compulsive Benjamin O’Ryan (Ben Kingsley), who may or may not be involved with a series of killings that Mackelway is investigating. So his former partner/lover, Fran Kulok (Carrie-Anne Moss), an agent from Dallas, us sent over to help him. It seems O’Ryan, who is also a former G-man, is proficient in the ESP telepathic specialty of “remote viewing,” which allows him to project himself into the guilt-ridden minds of murderers whom he then stalks and kills. He removes their eyelids and leaves a carved symbol – a zero with a slash through it – as his calling card. That refers to O’Ryan’s grisly theory that a serial killer can succeed only if the choice of his victims is random because, without a pattern, there is no trail. The screenplay by Zak Penn and Billy Ray is so crammed with confusing flashbacks and weird, supernatural visions that director W. Elias Merhige (“Shadow of a Vampire”) seems quite overwhelmed by the pulpy obscurity of the cryptic concept. Not to mention the plot loopholes and serious lack of character development. What a waste of acting talent! On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Suspect Zero” is an eerie, implausible 2. There’s a rumor that the state of New Mexico floated an interest-free, $7.5 million loan for this film production in exchange for 2.5% of the profits and – if that’s true – there could be a strong case for fiscal irresponsibility.

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Wicker Park

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Wicker Park” (MGM release)

Back in 1996, there was this dandy French thriller called “L’Appartement” which screenwriter Brandon Boyce (“Apt Pupil”) and director Paul McGuigan (“The Reckoning”) have adapted into this melancholy, lightweight, less-than-thrilling stalker tale set in snowy Chicago. Bland Josh Hartnett, who was given a big publicity push as Hollywood’s next big heartthrob in “Pearl Harbor” and “Hollywood Homicide,” stars as Matthew, a morose, lovesick dolt. Just before embarking on an important business trip to Shanghai, this young investment banker overhears a conversation in a restaurant phone booth and thinks he recognizes his long-lost love Lisa (Diane Kruger a.k.a. Helen in “Troy”). Desperate to track her down, he jettisons his current fiancŽe (Jessica Pare) and career to find this woman, a dancer, who vanished without a trace two years earlier. But the Lisa he discovers is a different person. She’s an actress named Alex (Rose Byrne), the girl-friend of Luke (Matthew Lillard), who’s Matthew’s best-friend. Confused? Yeah. The fragmented action of this frenzied psychological drama about jealousy, betrayal and improbable coincidences jumps back and forth in time, reflecting different character’s points of view. The title comes from the Chicago neighborhood in which all this occurs, even though much of the filming was done in Montreal. In a subtle tribute to writer/director Gilles Mimouni’s “L’Appartement,” the pivotal restaurant is called Belluci’s, since that film starred Monica Belluci and Vincent Cassel, and Paul McGuigan evokes memories of Hitchcock’s camerawork. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Wicker Park” is a convoluted, obsessive, exasperating 4. “Love makes people do crazy things” says one character. And this “sticky wicker” is one of them.

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Cellular

Movie/TV Reviews / Susan

Susan Granger’s review of “Cellular” (New Line Cinema)

Perhaps screenwriter Larry Cohen conceived this comedic suspense story as a wireless companion piece to “Phone Booth,” but something went wrong from conception to execution in the hands of novice scripter Chris Morgan and director David R. Ellis (“Final Destination 2”). There’s this high school science teacher, Jessica Martin (Kim Basinger), who’s kidnapped from her suburban home and held hostage in a musty attic as thugs search for something her husband has. Unable to escape, she resourcefully patches together a smashed rotary-dial phone and dials a random number. It’s the cellphone of Ryan (Chris Evans), a laid-back California surf dude who’s goofing off with his pal at the Santa Monica pier. At first he doesn’t believe Jessica’s damsel-in-distress diatribe, but after he hears her being roughed up by her captor (Jason Statham), he tries not to lose her signal en route to a police station and then takes off to save both Jessica and her 11 year-old son who’s been stashed away in a nearby garage. And when a soon-to-be-retired veteran Desk Sgt. (William H. Macy) investigates her story, he too becomes a hero. The silly, gimmick-y script is implausible from the get-go. I mean, what science teacher drives a brand-new Porsche, has a housekeeper and doesn’t bother to go to work on a school day? That Ellis’ previous experience was as a stunt choreographer is evident. When in doubt, he throws in another car chase or shoot-out. As for Basinger’s performance, it seems, literally, to have been phoned-in. On the other hand, the contemporary “cellular” humor hits the mark, eliciting more laughs than you’d expect, and Macy’s always worth watching. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Cellular” is an inept, flimsy 5. This lifeline has a tenuous connection.

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